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Closing Time

Do you feel as though you’ve been rehabilitated? Me: Reeehabilitated? Yes. Rehabilitated. According to your files, you attended Alan C. Pope High School from 1997 to 2001. During that time, you were a...

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Where the Weird Things Are

“Are you talking about fucking rubrics again?” Several months ago, I was finally able to cross #11 off my list: Drive across, around, and up and down the United States. For two weeks, my sister...

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What Playground Equipment Would You Be?

Sara Register, an advocate for tomfoolery and all things funny, has been a collaborative partner in crime for the past several years. She’s one of the teachers I worked with the most often, and got to...

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Left Shark Teaching in a Right Shark World

“Got a loaded question for ya, ‘How does it feel to be a sellout?’ Don’t worry, you can tell me later. Oh wait, you can’t.” That was one of the last questions Coach Dasinger asked me before I left Alan...

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Stranger Than Friction

“It was probably in the best interest of all that you decided to leave.” In every profession, there’s the good news and the bad news. The critiques and the critics. During the summer of 2011, I...

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Relative Realities

In 1992, someone made my parents an offer they couldn’t refuse. As it turned out, that offer involved the tremendously difficult decision to uproot my immediate family from our Wisconsin roots and move...

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Producing a Paradigm Shift

“Far better is it to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure…than to rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy nor suffer much, because they live in a gray...

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The Happy Book

In 1990 (when I was 7 years old), I created one of my first books. It was titled simply, The Happy Book. A few days ago, as I was putting together an Art of Teaching interview I’d asked my Mom to...

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Independent Innovations

Hey Ryan! I came across your Kickstarter and was really impressed (by both your ideas and your drive)! I work for an independent publishing company in Northern Virginia and we’d love to be involved in...

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More Than It Seems

Why do you want to do this?  Why are you still trrryyyying to do this? Why? Over the past twelve months, “Why?” has become an increasingly popular question. In fact, it’s become so popular, I dare say...

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Who’s Coming With Me?

Sometimes I wonder if I’m gonna Jerry Maguire my way out of a job. Like one night I’m gonna eat some bad pizza for dinner, wake up at 2 AM and mistakenly infer some divine inspiration from the gods...

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Land of Gathering

Trumpets. Maybe it’s trumpets. But then again, maybe it’s bugles. Why do I even know what the fuck a bugle is? It’s a horn, right? Like a small brass-hornish thing? Let’s just go with trumpets. I hear...

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Talking in Code

What would ya say…ya do there? When I got into teaching, I knew I wanted to make a (positive) difference. And if I’m being honest, my 23-old self would have told you I wanted to change the world. Fast...

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Trouble with the Curve

“Play any sports growing up?” If you say another fucking word, I’m gonna pick your little midget ass up and throw you in that fucking trash can right over there! By the end of my high school baseball...

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Exercises in Futility

Thanks for calling Your Pie Buckhead this is Ryan how may I help you? The summer before I started doing what I do now, I worked at a pizza place. Money was tight. Actually, money’s always been tight....

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Ricochet (part 1 of 3)

Kindle (kin·dle) – verb To light or set on fire. To arouse or inspire (an emotion or feeling).  Synonyms:  light, ignite, set fire to, put a match to, rouse, wake, awaken  Example Usage:  The collision...

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Ricochet (part 2 of 3)

Fire (fīr) – noun The burning intensity of feeling; ardor or enthusiasm. Liveliness and vivacity of imagination; brilliance. A severe test or trial.  Example Usage:  Teaching at South Cobb High School...

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Ricochet (part 3 of 3)

Fire In The Belly – idiom A powerful sense of ambition or determination. “Look. Guys. We’re all working on a dream, right? For example, I’ve got this book I wrote about my first 5 years as a teacher....

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Pardon the Interruption

How’d the meeting go? Me: Would’ve been fantastic if I’d popped a fucking Xanax beforehand. Most workdays start with email. When I was still in the classroom…when I was still a high school English...

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Concession Stand

Boss: Don’t get me wrong, Ryan. You’re creative. You have an excellent rapport with the kids, but if you want to continue being a teacher here, you need to make some concessions. Or consider teaching...

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